what was your autistic child like as a baby mumsnet

A lot of kids aren’t lucky enough to have this and it’s awful. You don't want to be thought of as the same as 'those families' who have the issueses you described. He has enough technology to do his school work, we have (pre covid) plenty of days out together, he’s fed and clothed well etc. It's an emotive word but you do need to accept it. I’m probably not articulating myself very well but I do understand OP. "High" functioning used to just mean "has language" and covers a very wide range of abilities and needs. We must be at peace with our weaknesses, and take pride in our strengths. Talk widget showing discussions of the day & trending threads, Subscribe to Mumsnet emails direct to your inbox. Maybe Childline or similar can help? They will know what to do. Share the things that you love to save for, Calling all parents: please take our survey - £100 voucher to win, Are you pregnant? And DS' challenges are, relatively speaking, quite minor. You said shouting and much more, so it's not the same as just general losing your temper and shouting because you are so frustrated. I cannot always hold it in. He has two loving parents, we both work, he has an older brother who looks out for him, we have permanent housing, he has his own bedroom and space to play. It can be over things like us telling him to come off the xbox, school work, telling him to get ready because we need to go out. As it stands, we don't know if there are any autistic traits, adhd or anything. What am I hearing from nextdoor neighbours? He has two loving parents, we both work, he has an older brother who looks out for him, we have permanent housing, he has his own bedroom and space to play. Surely your dd is t vulnerable in a ‘social/home context’ way but is ‘vulnerable’ because of adverse consequences of not being at school to his particular education needs. You can do this via the NSPCC online or over the phone if you want to remain anonymous. Any child with an EHCP is classed as vulnerable for these purposes.The reason they are classed as vulnerable is outlined in their EHCP - it's all that additional support they need. Ignore people who think a virus is more important. But it is very difficult to find one term that can apply to all of those children who need a little extra. I am pretty sure that as concerned parents you made a strong case for your child to be assessed and to be funded to attend the school in the first place because you recognised that he would sink and struggle in mainstream. I do understand the sort of visceral instinctive response to you child being classed as vulnerable as I'm in a similar situation. But it doesn't define him, or you. Portail des communes de France : nos coups de coeur sur les routes de France. One of my dc’s is classed as vulnerable, she has ASD and attends a sn school (has a ehcp), it doesn’t mean she’s neglected or at risk of harm at home but it does mean she needs more support and needs a routine to keep her mental health under control, so yes, she is vulnerable. To those saying that you're being ridiculous - I wish any one of the neighbours had reported the daily screaming and crying matches between me and my mum. To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet. Instead of language like 'report' use language like 'information share' or 'share concerns' because that's what you would be doing. If you would like to read this article, or get unlimited access to The Times and The Sunday Times, find out more about our special 12 week offer here Google has many special features to help you find exactly what you're looking for. It can't do any harm to report. I have Autism and consider myself vulnerable. Sometimes this involves shouting between us but she'll have a meltdown at least once a day. I’m not offended that they assume all Sen kids need extra help as most of these kids will need this help for the rest of their lives, what I am offended with however, is that my son is assumed to be in need when all of his needs are met. Naughty1205 there could be LOTS of harm in reporting an innocent situation. To think WFH permanently is a game changer? 12 is a tween with lots of attitude. If you insist he's not vulnerable then give up his space there and let a really 'vulnerable' child have it. My 12 year old ds has a terrible temper. Netmums is the UK's biggest parenting website offering local info, expert parenting advice, chat, competitions, recipes and friendly support My DS is academically behind, no SEN or anything else and he's classes a vulnerable and in full time. You yourself said he struggled during the first lockdown. That would be a reason for the child's behaviour, but not the adults. Everyday I'm like a pan on the stove just about to boil over but sometimes his shouting gets the better of me a d I retailate. He is currently still attending his small autism specialist school but he’s doing so because school have made a place available to every child. It depends on the shouting. Never miss a beat with MailOnline's latest news for women. I have twins who are both autistic and attend a similar school. I am sure that pretty much every time he thought they were angry, they were in fact happy and just expressing it at a volume and with an energy that he wasn't used to.Never mind that maybe their dd has issues that need addressing, but since we're in the middle of a pandemic, they aren't getting the support they need. DH and I moved into new home around a year ago. A lot of kids aren’t lucky enough to have this and it’s awful. Covid has also closed schools, creating a huge crisis in childcare. The term vulnerable is used generally for those children who need more support than typical children, for myriad reasons. Diese Bilder haben wir so komprimiert, dass sie platzsparend sind und die geringere Bandbreite bei mobilen Geräten berücksichtigen. SARAH SANDS: Jobs that are local and part-time, and so particularly attractive to women, are disappearing. It is a blunt tool. to of and a in " 's that for on is The was with said as at it by from be have he has his are an ) not ( will who I had their -- were they but been this which more or its would about : after up $ one than also 't out her you year when It two people - all can over last first But into ' He A we In she other new years could there ? But in this context your child (and mine) is vulnerable because without the structure of school he is at even greater risk of his education suffering than other children. If I was playing up at that age I was shouted at. This means, by the current definition of vulnerable in the school setting, he is vulnerable. Although my sister's are 11 and 13, I don't remember my mum ever saying they did anything like this.. she has seen one of her mild temper tantrums.So your neighbours could be going through similar. He did not speak Italian. I also have a short temper. Especially upstairs in the mornings and evenings. I have 3 sen kids. So my 10 year old ds has autism and because he attends specialist school he is automatically classed as vulnerable. Hope it going ok Op b. I can see why you don't really like the term "vulnerable" because he's not in terms of having a solid family, having support etc.But the fact that he has SEN does make him "educationally vulnerable" because he needs the specialist school place and professionals with the appropriate knowledge to support him etc. These comments are insane. Explore celebrity trends and tips on fashion, style, beauty, diets, health, relationships and more. It’s so much better to be safe than sorry- it’s absolutely not normal to have complete screaming matches with your child every day. As pp said Italian can sound “loud and angry” as well as Arabic, Spanish and many others. Before the first UK lockdown, we'd frequently hear Wife and DD having morning screaming matches lasting 20 minutes or so, very regularly, maybe 3 times a week. The problem is it's mostly all in another language so we can't tell if it's something like "I've told you a thousand times to get your shoes on!" This is page 2 of 6 (This thread has 147 messages.). We want our children to go out into the world as confident and independent young people and labelling them as vulnerable implies this will not be safe for them. As they feel they provide a warm, loving home and give their children lots of help with education despite needing a bit of financial support from the state due to disability, or unemployment.For what its work my child with autism is vulnerable - not to the risk of harm from home, but to missing out on education entirely as he can only access it in a particular way. Either way, reporting would have been a good thing for the child. We all have a short temper,apart from dp. Before the first UK lockdown, we'd frequently hear Wife and DD having morning screaming matches lasting 20 minutes or so, very regularly, maybe 3 times a week. To the people saying there could be a reason, the child could have learning difficulties. So whatever their culture it's not ok. I think you are over thinking it. My 7 year old shout when he's annoyed aswell. Search the world's information, including webpages, images, videos and more. Whether it’s child abuse or whether the parents are having some form of mental health crisis, you should call for help. He will scream and shout amd cry and even hit things when he is pissed off. It could be abuse so I would report to social services. Are you sure it’s not a “shouty” sounding language? If you don’t want the place then withdraw him and get him a place in mainstream, I bet the school has a waiting list of desperate children who would blossom in the school. OP I work in primary school. YABU. Me and DH have discussed with eachother as there are a couple of things which sound like adhd but nothing totally obvious, which makes it difficult. We have neighbours on one side; Husband, Wife and one DD (approx 8 years old). And sometimes the people with ASD who can "pass as normal" most actually need a lot more help and support because of the effort involved in "passing" and the fact that fewer concessions are made to their needs. Or you could just oversee his learning from home, like everyone else has to. How would you feel if someone posted about being offended their child has been classed as having SEN because their child has some difficulties with learning so are on the schools SEN register because they felt it implies they have special needs like your child’s? My DD has an EHCP and is in school, she has ASD as well. Vulnerable is just a blanket term for children who need to be in school because home learning isn't suitable for them, due to a plethora of reasons, some of which you put in your post. And if you "report" this, then someone will have to come out and investigate which means that that's an exposure to covid, and a use of a resource that almost certainly could be better used elsewhere.Some cultures are more "shouty" than others. You could always send him in with a placard round his neck saying 'I'm from a two parent household and they both have good jobs' if it makes you feel better. Ab sofort werden 3300 Bilder, die in Gesetzen oder Urteilen enthalten sind, dargestellt. To think WFH permanently is a game changer? They were usually doing something like talking about the football scores, or what they were eating or the lottery. I also think that the only respite for this child might be school and school is closed. We hear screaming/shouting/banging, almost every day or every other day. Are you worried that your child will be lumped in with the ones who have druggie parents who are still asleep at 11am while they try to do a Zoom lesson without supervision? As others have said there may be nothing to worry about at all or this could be a child living in a highly volatile and emotionally damaging environment. 'I'm not aware of any learning difficulties. The last piece of the (puzzle and all that.I'm surprised nobody reported me, as we can be very noisy and my youngest screams when he gets overwhelmed. I hate to think what the neighbours hear because she will scream, shout, stomp up the stairs, throw things. Weebly’s free website builder makes it easy to create a website, blog, or online store. You sound like a snob. At the moment she is at home but she’s struggling so may have to go back to school in the near future. You can't have it both ways. If you don’t think he’s vulnerable then don’t send him to school. So no, I wouldn't report it unless I thought the child sounded scared. I’m grateful that my ds can still attend school but I resent the fact that he is classed as vulnerable because of his Sen. Now don’t get me wrong there are some kids at my ds’s school who are vulnerable, very much so. As others have said, vulnerable is not a reflection of you or your husband's parenting, or his home set up - it all sounds lovely for him. You are right to be concerned. To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet. It’s a form of othering as is your post. I don’t agree with shouting at your child doing no harm. You don’t know of any learning difficulties including the situation and yet you want to report. 106 talking about this. That does make him a bit vulnerable because if he didn't have that he might struggle in mainstream or at home.It sounds like you are looking at other kids who are classed as vulnerable and comparing your son to them and thinking they are very different. You need to make the decision that makes you comfortable not confuse the issue further. the , . If (as has been suggested) the girl has additional needs, it would appear the parents need support - see how Daisychains handles her dd: by not shouting herself). At least one of them in the house, possibly all three, need some help. My DD has ASD and goodness knows what our neighbours think when she is having a meltdown. It’s really hard as a parent busting your backside to maximise your child’s quality of life to be told they are vulnerable. We don't know them very well at all with the language barrier, just friendly hellos over the fence.AIBU to report it (to who!?) You say the child is getting distressed. It’s not a judgement on you, it’s an assessment of your child’s needs. Usually when we say she can't watch YouTube at night or if she gets told off. I think most will understand vulnerability to encompass loads of different things. We have neighbours on one side; Husband, Wife and one DD (approx 8 years old). They are vulnerable as they cannot access their education at home very well due to their sen. My autistic child self harmed when he thought he wasnt going back to school. YABU. Every single bloody safeguarding training I've had emphasised that you have to report a concern. This is page 1 of 13 (This thread has 322 messages.). Sign up to test new midwifery service Juno. then ring the headteacher and voice your concerns. Even if the shouting is as harmless as “I’ve told you a thousand times to put your shoes on” it shouldn’t be yelled at a child with such “aggression” that it causes that level of distress. . I manage to get mine out without shouting. But in this context your child (and mine) is vulnerable because without the structure of school he is at even greater risk of his education suffering than other children. If you don't want him to be considered vulnerable then you don't want his considered disabled either. Monthly perhaps. DH and I moved into new home around a year ago. We didn't have anything like this in my house when I grew up. Child could be autistic or many other things you don’t know about. My DD is 8. It’s not personal to you though. Things quietened down for a bit, but have really taken off again in the last couple of months. He is vulnerable to/at risk of suffering disproportionately due to not going to school during the lockdown. Occasional tantrums and some arguing between DPs, but nothing like this and not almost every day. Some people will report a neighbor for having an extra person in their house on Christmas Day but will ignore potential child abuse or people who are not coping mentally. On the days I just can't muster the strength to placate myself, we can get a bit shouty. Eight is still the golden and easy time in childhood. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. Breast milk contains anti-viral factors and antibodies which are likely to offer your baby some protection against COVID-19. I have nothing to hide if someone comes along, it can be bloody difficult at times).

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